Provided by: funny-manpages_2.3-1_all bug

NAME

       flog — speed up a process

SYNOPSIS

       flog [-l n] [-a m] [-u] process-id

DESCRIPTION

       Flog  is  used  to stimulate an improvement in the performance of a process that is already in execution.
       The process-id is the process number of the process that is to be disciplined.

       The value n of the -l flag is the flagellation constant, i.e., the number of lashes  to  be  administered
       per minute.  If this argument is omitted, the default is 17, which is the most random random number.

       The  value  m of the -a flag is the number of times the inducement to speed up is to be administered.  If
       this argument is omitted, the default is one, which is based on  the  possibility  that  after  that  the
       process will rectify its behavior of its own volition.

       The  presence  of the -u flag indicates that flog is to be unmerciful in its actions.  This nullifies the
       effects of the other keyletter arguments.  It is recommended that this option be used only  on  extremely
       stubborn processes, as its over-use may have detrimental effects.

FILES

       Flog will read the file /have/mercy for any entry containing the process-id of the process being speeded-
       up.  The file can contain whatever supplications are deemed necessary, but,  of  course,  these  will  be
       ignored if the -u flag is supplied.

SEE ALSO

       On  Improving  Process  Performance by the Administration of Corrective Stimulation, CACM , vol. 4, 1657,
       pp. 356-654.

DIAGNOSTICS

       If a named process does not exist, flog replies ``flog you'' on the standard output.  If flog happens  to
       kill(2) the process, which usually happens when the -u keyletter argument is supplied, it writes ``RIP,''
       followed by the process-id of the deceased, on the standard output.

BUGS

       Spurious supplications for mercy by the process being flogged sometimes wind up on the  standard  output,
       rather than in /shut/up.

                                                                                                      FLOG(1fun)